The Case for Rest

To Rest or Not to Rest?

You’re struggling to complete a paper for school or project for work. You notice you’re judging yourself for needing a break, thinking you’re “lazy” or lack drive. And because of this, you have difficulty listening to your body, even when it’s signaling for a break. 

Of course, our culture doesn’t help. All of the messages we hear about hustling and pounding the pavement are hard not to internalize. This “go, go, go” mentality can make it challenging to slow down or step away when working on a task. It can feel like we have to keep moving forward in order to justify our existence.

If you struggle in this area, you’re not alone. However, rest is a critical part of maintaining well-being and functioning effectively. And for those who are struggling with mental health symptoms, when downtime is overlooked, recovery can be harder to achieve. Below, we explore how intentional rest can ease your mental and physical loads, as well as some strategies to experiment with to begin integrating more rest into your life.

Rest and the Nervous System

Have you heard the phrase “tired but wired?” Individuals who suffer from anxiety often have thoughts such as, “I will fall behind if I slow down” or “I will spiral when I rest.” And yet without these pauses, the nervous system never has time to reset; worry, irritability, and physical manifestations of anxiety (e.g., headaches, stomach aches, muscle tightness or twitching) continue to surface. Rest can regulate the body and slow the mind down. When we actually have time and space to observe our thoughts, rather than be hijacked by them, we can reduce their charge and interact with theme more effectively. Rest can also help us become less vulnerable to intense emotions. While it doesn’t take emotions away,  it can lower their volume and arm us with more resources to cope with them.

For those who have experienced trauma, we see even more of a case for rest. Trauma has a significant impact on the body; existing in fight, flight, or freeze can lead to hypervigilance, sleep difficulties, irritability, panic, a feeling of being on edge, numbness, disassociation, and fatigue. For many trauma survivors, slowing down can be a challenge. Relaxation can be experienced as a threat, because the body has been conditioned to operate in survival mode. But just as the nervous system can be shaped by trauma, it can also be shaped by experiences of safety and calm. As you practice intentional stillness, you can gradually become more comfortable with these experiences. Pausing can help rewire the brain and body to understand that safety can exist even when at rest.

Rest in DBT

According to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), rest can play an important role in emotion regulation. When our systems are overworked, emotions become more heightened and difficult to manage. DBT emphasizes how taking care of the body helps us become less vulnerable to overwhelming emotions. Rest shows up a number of times in the DBT skills curriculum:

1. Doing mind versus being mind: In this mindfulness skill, we bring our attention to the balance (or lack thereof) between producing and simply existing. For many, the scale is tipped toward productivity, with mindful presence taking a back seat. The concept of being mind makes the case for stopping to smell the roses versus habitually choosing forward motion.
2. PLEASE skills: These skills teach us to regulate the mind by regulating the body. The “S” in the PLEASE skills stands for sleep, with the goal being to get sufficient and balanced sleep. Inadequate sleep can negatively impact our mood, focus, patience, and more. 
3. Vacation: This crisis survival skill in the distress tolerance module encourages us to take a break from adulting when things get too hard. The idea is to briefly step away from all the stress, physically and/or mentally pausing before returning to what needs to be done.
4. Relaxation: This is another crisis survival skill, part of a set of skills referred to as “improving the moment.” Relaxation encourages us to seek out relaxing and soothing activities when in distress. This might look like taking some deep breaths, doing a couple of yoga poses, massaging the neck and shoulders, or lying under a weighted blanket.

Each of these skills is an opportunity to slow down, pause, and recharge. Of course, this can be challenging, especially as judgments arise around taking this much-needed space for ourselves.  In this case, using the skill, radical acceptance, can help us resist judging ourselves for wanting or needing to rest, instead acknowledge our reality compassionately and non-judgmentally.

Rest Reframed

Slowing down does not come naturally to everyone. Like many things, rest is a skill that might need to be learned and practiced over time. It’s important to note that rest might seem uncomfortable at first, particularly for those who have lived under constant stress. Some starting strategies to help initiate more rest might include the following: 

1. Acknowledge any thoughts or beliefs you have about rest that interfere with you engaging in this practice. Where did the beliefs come from? How do they serve (or hinder) you?
2. Try resting for short periods to start. Build up over time.
3. Experiment with different ways of resting. Maybe you sit for five minutes without multitasking. May you take a 20-minute break from studying. Maybe you take that nap. Individualize your practice.
4. Gather data about your experiences. What do you notice? Is there anything you can tweak to help you continue to delve into this practice?

Rest does not require an all-or-nothing mentality; any amount can help. Pausing can facilitate emotional regulation, recovery, and sustainability in the long run. And you don’t have to go into overdrive to earn it. Rest is a right, not a reward. 

-by Emily Wolman, Gatewell Practicum Student